


falling doesn't feel so bad when i know you're falling this way too

by evantheworm



Category: Minecraft (Video Game), Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff and Angst, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Oops, cw for self-doubt insecurities and crying, still dont know how to tag things, this was for karlnap tuesday but its friday now
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-20
Updated: 2020-11-20
Packaged: 2021-03-10 00:28:39
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,104
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27644828
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/evantheworm/pseuds/evantheworm
Summary: sitting on the rooftop in fall isn't enough to take away all the pain of Karl's insecurities, but maybe his boyfriend can help
Relationships: Karl Jacobs/Sapnap
Comments: 11
Kudos: 350





	falling doesn't feel so bad when i know you're falling this way too

**Author's Note:**

> hello everyone! karlnap is just the best gods i love them okay. this was supposed to be finished like 2 weeks ago oops. also it was supposed to be all fluffy but now here we are. anyways i hope you enjoy my shitty writing i apologize for any oocness. thank you all for reading <3
> 
> Disclaimer: all of the shipping being done in this fic is with the explicit permission of the cc's. if any of them ever express discomfort or anything of the sort about these types of fics i will take this down.

Karl sat on the rooftop of his dorm building swinging his legs over the side like a little kid. The wind ruffled through his hair and fluffed it up more than it already, naturally, was. His nose and cheeks were pink from the chill of the late October wind. He always loved fall, it was cold, but he got to wear his big hoodies and sweaters that had to stay locked away in his closet during the warm summer months. 

He also loved fall because it meant he got to be with his friends, all in one place. Most of them had met online some time ago, playing Minecraft on different servers before eventually forming their own, but he still missed them when they were states or oceans apart. Although college was hard and classes never failed to keep him busy, the serene happiness of having almost all the people he loved just a dorm building away was enough. 

The long sleeves of his sweater fell over his hands and left only the very tips of his fingers exposed. Karl liked high places too, he liked to climb random trees, as a kid, just to see how far he could make it. The habit hadn’t exactly stopped now that he was an adult. He’d dragged his friends to the park up the street at 12 am far too many times. The top of the jungle gym was not safe from him. 

So, needless to say, Karl liked sitting on the roof of the dorms. It helped him think, clear his head, almost as if the breeze took the thoughts that constantly populated his head with it. All the thoughts of his unfinished video production homework, and his boyfriend who he really hoped he didn’t annoy or upset sweeping away into the wind. He closed his eyes and leaned his head back just slightly, his hands tightened a little against the rough edge of the concrete wall. 

“Hey you, be careful, you’re gonna fall.”

Karl’s eyes shot open at the sudden voice and his grip on the wall tightened. “Oh, hey Sap. You scared me.” 

Sapnap smiled a little and moved to sit next to Karl on the ledge, his legs facing inward toward the roof instead of the open campus. “You scared me,” He said, resting his left arm around Karl’s torso, “sitting so close to the edge like that. I don’t want you to fall.”

Karl fought the urge to lean into Sapnap’s touch, not wanting to be too annoying or clingy. “Sorry,” he fidgeted with the edge of his long sweater sleeve, “It’s cool up here, it’s like the jungle gym but way better.”

The smile that rested on Sapnap’s face grew just slightly, everything about Karl was beautiful and adorable, his little habits and quirks only made Sapnap fall more and more in love with him. But knowing Karl so well also meant Sapnap knew when he was feeling down, and today, he definitely was. He talked less and hung back from their friends; he gave far fewer hugs and had barely paid attention in his favorite class. Clearly his mind was floating away on some other planet. 

The trouble was, Karl didn’t exactly like to tell when he was upset. It added onto his already growing fears that he was too annoying and burdensome. No matter how many times Sapnap reminded him that he could always talk to him, sometimes he just couldn’t get through. It was like speedrunning minecraft but with every hindrance you could possibly add—unnervingly frustrating. 

Sapnap bumped Karl’s shoulder with his own. “You normally only come up here alone if you want to clear your head.” He pointed out, silently hoping Karl would take the bait. 

He didn’t though, just nodding and ducking his head to the side. How desperately he wanted to fall into Sapnap’s arms that were open in waiting for him. How badly he wanted to tell him everything. But that was selfish, that would only make things worse. Wouldn’t it? 

He did this every time, how was Sap not tired of him. His raging self-doubt pushing him away from everyone else, he didn’t know how his friends put up with it so often.

“I’m sorry Sap.” 

Sapnap’s heart ached at his boyfriend’s words. He wished he could take all the pain and doubt away.

“Why are you apologizing? You didn’t do anything wrong.”

Karl took a shuddering breath and ducked his head as he tried to wipe away the tears spilling down his cheeks. 

Sapnap’s heart shattered into a million tiny pieces, each with the ache of pain he couldn’t take away. He moved so both of his arms were wrapped around Karl and pulled him to his chest. “It’s okay, baby, I got you.”

The lid that Karl’s doubts tried to keep so tightly locked over his feelings was no match for the comfort Sapnap provided. He gripped his shaking hands in Sapnap’s shirt as the sobs wracked through his body. “I-I’m so-sorry. I-I always m-mess everything up. I’m s-so annoying, I don’t know how you p-put up with me.” 

“Hey, hey, hey.” Sapnap stroked a hand through Karl’s messy hair. He tried not to think about how much he hated the voice in Karl’s head, the voice that hurt the boy he loved, more than anyone or anything else.“It’s okay. You’re okay, Karl. I’ve got you.” 

Karl stayed wrapped up in Sapnap’s arms crying until he felt like there wasn’t a tear left in his body. He let go of Sapnap’s shirt and wiped his wet cheeks. “Sorry for… crying on you.” He said, an awkward half- laugh escaping his lips.

Sapnap tightened his grip around Karl, just slightly, hoping to convey all the things he wanted to say but didn’t know how through the embrace. “You don’t have to apologize, Karl. I mean it. It’s okay to be sad, even if there isn’t a reason for it.” He smiled a small smile down at Karl. “You’re not annoying, I promise. I love you and all of our friends love you, no matter what. We all promised to be there for each other, I don’t think any of us are going to be breaking that promise any time soon.”

Karl hugged Sapnap, “Thank you.” 

And he knew things would be okay, that there would be good days and bad days. Days where he wouldn’t be able to remember that his friends loved him and were there for him. But in the end, everything would be okay. He had Sapnap and he knew neither of them were letting go.


End file.
